I did it...

I spent my first night away from Collier this weekend. Justin’s mom is in town to keep Collier for Justin and I to go to Lake Martin with friends for the night. I felt like I did good, well better than I thought that I would. I think knowing that he was in such good hands helped and when I did call to check in, he was being really good and sweet. I felt like it was a big hurdle to get over and I am proud of myself of doing it. I tried to prepare explain to Justin the anxious feelings that I may feel about being away from Collier for the night…not that I am worried about him being taken care of but more of my separation and being away from him overnight for the first time. I felt that he would need me and I wouldn’t be there for him. He didn’t of course and I am thankful.

We went to Lake Martin to go to AquaPalooza (concert series that Alan Jackson does at lakes around the country)– it was a blast! They set the stage up at kowaliga and you pulled your boat up to watch the concert. There must have been 5000 boats there. It was unbelievable and like nothing I have ever seen before. Boats just connected with each other and you could walk from boat to boat they were tied so close together. We anchored back a little further (couldn’t even see the stage) but thankfully they had huge screens that we could watch from. There were several other acts that played before Alan Jackson, so it was a full day of music. The weather was great and we stayed in the water a good bit to keep cool. After such a busy day I crashed around 11pm and slept so good – no nursing at 4am….although I did wake up at 6 about to bust and so I had to pump….but I went right back to sleep and slept another 3 hours. It was very nice but I did miss that sweet little man. I was very glad to make it home on Sunday and hold him.

Justin and I have always said we would willingly allowing grandparents to take our children for weekends and nights. I feel that it is very important to have time for each other as husband and wife. It was harder than I really thought that it was going to be. But then again to have some fun time with Justin was well worth it. One of the couples that was with us had a wave runner that they took and as we needed we could go back to the house to potty pump. I knew being on the boat for 10 hours would be a challenge for a nursing mom!!! So, Justin took me back to the house and it was so much fun. I felt like I was in high school again….It has been forever since I’ve ridden a wave runner and it is silly and hard to explain, but being on the back of the wave runner and jumping waves and driving fast and crazy just was so fun. Just the two of us with no other worries but to just be together. I am sure that my words are not making clear my feelings. But I felt so content with just being with my sweet husband. I am thankful for the time that we had and I am thankful that we were able to leave Collier and not have to worry about him. I don’t want to seem that we don’t have sweet time because Collier is here but it is different when a baby enters the family. I wouldn’t want to be any other way and I certainly couldn't be away from Collier very often but every now and then it is just needed. I love the new family that we have and I love Collier so much but to have all my energy to devote to Justin felt really good. Ok. Enough rambling, I hope you understand what I mean!